AP World DBQ Outline + Thesis Practice with Feedback

1. Outline arguments you would make, using LESS than a full sentence for each
2. List, but DO NOT describe, evidence, both documents and outside evidence
3. Write a thesis based on these arguments Note: on the actual exam spending more than 20 minutes on this will not leave you with enough time to complete what you plan

DBQ Revolutions in Americas Prompt

Outlines and Feedback

Thesis and Outline Practice Submission 1

1. Lower classes and Prejudice continued: Doc 2, Doc 4 (Only Creoles benefited, slavery continued) Doc 5
2. White Creoles gained power: Doc 3 (Bolivar was a Creole, Hidalgo and Mexican Revolution)
3. But, still great divisions among social classes–> underdevelopment + neocolonialism

A way to improve your thesis would be to indicate a specific revolution which corresponds to your description. As for your question, abut complexity, that nuance could contribute to complexity but that itself is not complexity. Overall your structure looks good to me, but for your first paragraph you could be a bit more narrow. Prejudice against the lower classes? Race or labor based prejudice? Narrow that down.

Thesis and Outline Practice Submission 2

1. Diminished Power of Elites: Doc 5, Doc 3, American Revolution (Freedom from Monarchy), French Revolution
2. Freed Enslaved People: Doc 1, Doc 2, Haitian Revolution
3. Social Hierarchy Intact: Doc 4, Creole Revolutions (Creole replace Peninsulares)

Your thesis is sufficient. If you want to make it better you could consider using hedging and qualified language such as the types of hierarchies reinforced/challenged (Labor, race, class). Your essay structure looks fine, but if you are running out of time consider combining paragraphs 1 and 2. Hope this helps keep practicing.

Thesis and Outline Practice Submission 3

1. Freedom of slaves: 1, 2
2. Destruction of monarchies: 3
3. Continued racism: 4
4. Continuance of harsh/inconsiderate ruling: 5

This thesis does a good job setting up your claim (the word “profound” works well here) and your line of reasoning. It’s clear what you plan to develop for your argument in your body paragraphs.

As you practice with DBQs, consider how you might bring documents together in your body paragraphs. This outline works, but a stronger (and easier to write) outline might find ways to bring documents together under a common argument and keep your overall essay to just 2 body paragraphs.

Complexity isn’t about bringing in modern examples necessarily. That skill point is about developing a complex argument throughout the whole essay. Think about how you could connect all of your ideas together throughout the paragraphs and fully explain your ideas. That will get you closer on many points, whether or not it earns that one complexity point.

Thesis and Outline Practice Submission 4

1. Social inequality: Docs 2,4; continued to enslave African Americans in North America
2. Obstacles of forming a fair of government: Doc 5; instability and poor governance=poverty and economy dependent on former colonizer countries
3. Creoles gaining power: Docs 1,3; Simon Bolivar, Jose de San Martin

To start, I’ll address your question. Yes, there are multiple correct answers to this prompt (and any DBQ). The questions and document sets are designed to allow students to successfully defend any of a variety of claims. If your claim fits with your knowledge of history AND your understanding of the documents, it will likely count as “historically defensible.” (Basically, don’t stress it - you’ve got this!)

This is a really sophisticated thesis that addresses both political and social ideas. It looks like you know that to make the political/governance stuff work, you’ll need to connect it to social hierarchies. Good work.

I’m glad to see your body paragraphs include multiple documents. That’s the fastest/easiest way to be sure that you’re using them and actually developing an argument. Keep it up!